Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize