I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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