We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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