Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize