A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
