erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
