The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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