so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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