idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
