wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
