dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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