We should be called the Road Head Warriors
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
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