Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
