One girl and one boy is just not enough.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize