playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize