just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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