Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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