so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
