Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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