is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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