It's Friday. Sex?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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