Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize