I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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