the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Randomize
