16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
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