we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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