Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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