My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
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