Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
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