Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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