I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Randomize
