No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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