I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize