this beer tastes like vomit already
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
