Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
