real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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