If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
