It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
