I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Randomize