She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize