You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
