We named our party play list daddy issues
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
