Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Randomize