so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
His hands were made for my vagina.
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btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
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