Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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