Midget sex pt 2 tonight
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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