And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
