i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Even my vagina gasped.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize