if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Welp...herpes.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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