so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
